i got arrested......

[Robochimp]

last night in guildford for being drunk and incapable, i lost my friends at 2, i was found by the feds at 4 outside argos.

aparently i told them i was cold and wanted to go home, so they locked up up and a charging me 50 quid

[sky]

serves you right.

learn how to handle your alchohol.

[genocide]

lol stick it to The Man!

[Pickle]

You wally!

[SoFreshSoClean]

you sure it was you who "lost" your friends? might wanna reasses friendships dawg..

poorlad

shud have found a premier inn comes cheaper than that still..

[Raiden]

the 'feds' are you sure you were in guilford and not south central la ?

[Robochimp]

well at the time i dont think i knew where i was lol

[buttercup]

I hate the police.

My dad has just finished writing them another letter. It's quite good and explains about how no one from our family has ever been in trouble, and how I was treated in Watford a couple of weekends ago.

I knew what I was doing though and I was winding them up with intellectually covered up cusses.....i.e. "Do you have to go through an extensive training program to get to where you are now?" :p

One female officer, gave me an air hostess fake smile, to try and make herself seem more in control of the situation than she actually was, got it hard. I asked her...'why are you smiling? I don't like you...' after I said that her smile fell and I begun again 'aaahhh, where's your smile gone? that's it, let out your true feelings dear...' etc.

Later, as my friend was innocently being dropped off by the police, I decided to film the cop car dropping my mate off at 4am (aftering having to wait in the cold for 2hours). He told me to put the mobile camera away, I asked him 'why?' and he said 'because you're not supposed to be filming!' I continued to film and in a drunken instant, he's got out the car and TRIED to grab the camera out of my hand...

SHOCK

...I wrestled with him for a bit, trying to keep posession of my phone (there's a lot of incriminating evidence on there - speeding, drug taking to name a couple) and so I tried to make a break for it, by pulling against the phone with my bodyweight...I failed and he said 'Right!!' and tried to get me in a headlock!!!!!

DOUBLE DRUNKEN SHOCK

...Then I tried again, ducked this time, all my weight clutching the phone - escaped.

Bye copper, I'm an ex-100m sprinter and triple jump country runner up...bye bye etc. He ran 10 paces and walked back to his car...And I got it all on my phone. #

So yeah, anyway...I'm gunna go rip into my acousticasity guitar. :cool:

[Chantelle]

You werent lost babe... your so-called " FRIENDS " ducked out on your backside.... they aint true lmaooo.... Never mind though just dont get drunk next time ... Take it as a lesson learned

[genocide]

It's in the arch of my back, The sun of my smile, The ride of my breasts, The grace of my style. I'm a woman. Phenomenally. Phenomenal woman, That's me.


roffle my waffles

[sky]

Its pointless arguing with the police...

they are just facist ******s.

[Dude]

I hear that, however on one occassion my bredwrin(Gavin) & I got pulled over by a couple of rookies(proper nervous & inexperienced). It was obvious we had both been blazing (smoke/smell/red eye etc.) so eventually we were asked if we holding any more.
Prior to this, I knew my bredwrin had a single lump of ash worth about an L's if that(emergency supply) . We both looked at each other and buss out laughing in their face (remember we were lean).
The copper then began to start his search & found about eight ripped packets of slims, my grinder and once collated all the debres from my seats/footwells etc. he must of had about 2grams of the sticky shite. By now as you can imagine I'm reeling off all kinds of flaffle about why its there, while Gavin pulls out his masterpeace trash & to our amazment this pig calls for back up.
Two twos, a meatwagon arrives, this time we were blessed with a couple of non-uniforms. Again Gavin & I were pissing ourselves with laughter thinking whats the worse that can happen- a lecture on soft drugs oh pleeease!
What killed it was by now I was bussing joke with the CID (who told me themselves that these guys that stopped us were new & still wet behind the ears) while Gavin was being carted away, I was told to go on my merry way & the copper even gave me directions for my location.

[Chantelle]

roffle my waffles


You know you like my signature. :) ermm by the why is Roffle My Waffle a good or bad ting??? :confused:

either way if its nasty, dutty or rude imma slap you... * better not he might like it * ;)